Picture the club at 08:00 on the morning of Friday, February 28 - It was deserted! The sky was very dark, the rain was precipitating down and only two trotters turned up. Slowly, more hardy chickens started to arrive, until a total of nine feathered friends stood gazing out of the window and willing the rain to go away. Hallelujah! - Our combined mental manipulations caused the rain to drift away eastwards, so we were able to paddle off and play.

The rain had ceased - but the wind persisted and good scores were hard to come by - never mind! - We were playing! The sun even managed to shine rather weakly as the games progressed, and when Steve Cole finally got to check out the unique trotter cards, the results were:

In fourth place, winning nothing at all with 21 points, but not losing strokes either, was Alan Yates. Also with 21 points, but with a better back five-hole score, Rabbits captain Paul Davies won 30p and was penalised one stroke. Continuing to improve, Neil Dickinson's score of 22 earned him 50p and reduced his handicap by three shots - but the top slot was snatched by Mike Fox with 27 points. When he returns from his two-week holiday, partly financed by his 70p winnings, Mike will have a handicap five strokes smaller than previously.

Somebody has to come last - but not necessarily for two weeks running! Sadly this was the fate of secretary/treasurer/vice-chief-trotter and chauffer Steve Cole, now 30p richer and two strokes better off.

There was only one two scored, but what a delightful deux it was! The unique trotters' card allows Mike Fox two shots on the 12th hole, so when he sank his second shot he scored; gross two for nett zero for five points - disgraceful!

Now for a very important item of news. We are fast approaching that time of year when the trotters celebrate their end of season with a last game - no entry fee, no stroke penalties and splendid trophies to be won - followed by a light lunch and prize-giving. It is traditional for the trotters to invite the captain, the secretary and our honorary Trotter – Marilyn. Another unique tradition is the trotters' raffle, where everybody who attends donates a small item to the event, receives a free ticket -and inevitably wins a prize! How charming. More information and a booking proforma will be available soon – the Chief Trotter implores all those who have trotted this season to please make every effort to attend.

Meanwhile, weather permitting, everybody is invited to trot today (Friday).

Shan't see you there!

M.F.