Chapman Foursomes Day

The early birds were in the clubhouse and raring to go. All awaited the captain’s decision to go ahead. With this in place, there was a mad rush to pay the entrance fee and get on the tee.

One or two anxious faces were seen searching for late arrivals. Not everyone made it, resulting in some hasty rearrangements. Three last minute members in the club, Steve Sutcliffe, Mick Whale and Paul Hannah, were drafted in to fill some of the spaces, allowing the first three groups to tee-off on time. Even so there was one twoball unable to find another pair to play against. A total of thirteen pairs took to the course.

This did not mar the competitive spirit on the day. All groups set off into a stiff breeze as the sky brightened. Scudding clouds and some fine drizzle did not help matters as each group manoeuvred, or is that meandered, its way around the course.

The competition was played over 15 holes, so everyone hoped to be in before the forecast afternoon showers. Not quite was the outcome and there were a few damp and chilly seniors putting out on the temporary par three 18th hole.

Having sanctioned the event, our worthy captain, Idwal had to overcome a painful hip as he struggled to stoop and put his tee peg in the ground. He reasoned that his swing was OK, so looked for his usual fluent swing off the tee. The ball travelled all of 50 yards up the slope, giving his partner, Dudley, a rather long shot down the first fairway. They recovered to score a six, a number that was to haunt them all the way around.

They eventually ended up with 24 points, which put them ahead of Paul Hannah/Geoff Aston, John Hancock/Hywel Probert and Bart Youll/Mick Seal.

Brian Morgan and Robin Hagley managed 27 points, one ahead of Derek Cole/Bob Howse, Chris Beecher/Alan Yates and Mick Whale/Roger Scholfield.

Steve Decosimo and Ron Murphy also scored 27 points, but with a better back nine. Stan Hudson and John Stevenson were hoping that they could repeat their win in the fourball played before Christmas. It was not to be as they captured third place with 30 points. Runners-up this week were Dave Henry and Steve Sutcliffe on 31 points.

In top spot with a total of 33 points (which included two blobs) was the pairing of Alan Jones and Des Stone.

This week’s raffle winner was Chris Beecher.

Stoned Chickens

Two-thirds of a dozen Chickens left the coop on a cold and breezy Friday morning wondering if they were going to be the one to pocket wealth untold at the end of the 15-hole contest and hit the headlines in this fine journal. Would the Editor repeat his trophy winning success of last week?

The Early Birds took to the first fairway (or the 18th in one case!) to begin their quests for riches and fame and had a decent start - eight points between them on the first. The next threeball had a good try to emulate this team-score first hole achievement, but fell one point adrift, whilst the Wheely Boys notched five points from their two scores - so was it all downhill from there?

For the Wheelers, the answer was - yes, as a total of 20 points after the front nine and another four blobs on the back side left them just about averaging a point a hole and meant Ron Murphy ended up with the booby, although he will get his 30p entry fee returned and play off a handicap increased by two to 30 next time.

For the Back Enders, the answer was - sort of. They weren’t to know when they stood on the second tee, but there would be nine blobs ahead of their threeball, one would not quite manage to get into the 20s, one would lose out on fourth place on the back six and one would grab a podium place.

In the case of the Early Birds, they kept up their scoring performance and, despite two both ending up in the sand on the third for a team score of one, they all scored 20-plus to finish ‘on the result sheet’ by all getting top four placings.

There was a distinct lack of twos on the day, blamed in various explanations on the wind strength and direction, the cold extremities and the extra layers being worn to combat the other issues.

There was a familiar voice awaiting the arrival of the Trotters at the watering hole as the Living Room Sky-Diver made a welcome appearance to prove that reports of his demise had been somewhat premature and he regaled those present with detail of his triple salchow onto the coffee table, before he returned to his role as ‘Result Announcer’ - a role he last fulfilled on October 27! It has been SO quiet without him.

He announced that the blobs had totalled 24 and the par for the day was 21, which also happened to be the score obtained by Stan Hudson in fourth place (beating the Editor on the back six), although Stan won no money, but, importantly also got no cut.

Bronze place went to Geoff Aston with 24 points - no mean achievement considering his reduced handicap of 25 - and his reward was broadcast as 30p, plus a cut of one shot to play off 29 next time out (which will be totally unfathomable for those without the knowledge of how Chicken handicaps work - a very select few indeed).

Silver place for his 26 points off a reduced handicap of nine (yes, he’s a single figure golfer) went to the Chicken Organiser - Steve Cole - who pocketed the grand sum of 60p (two free weeks!) and had his actual Chicken handicap of 14 reduced by three to 11 next time out.

Picking up the first place prize money of 90p and getting his handicap of 18 cut by five to 13 was the outcome of a fine 28 points for the ‘Chicken of the Week’ - Des Stone - and he acknowledged the plaudits from the assembled throng, before heading off to help Stan move a washing machine.

Des could be a good outside bet to retain the Booker Prize (which he won in dramatic fashion on the final day last season) as he’s got two decent scores in now in the ‘Best five to count’ contest, plus he had a good finish last winter, with four of his best scores coming in the last five weeks, although Big Al, his usual Buggy Pal, is another option, with a better average from his three outings. Steve C currently holds the lead with 139, ahead of Neil on 136 and Richard Davies on 130.

See you on the tee today (Friday)?

Unusual activity

Our links reporter, Warren Hacker, has a mate whose second cousin’s next-door neighbour’s sister-in-law works at an important ‘Listening Service Place’ somewhere near Cheltenham. Apparently last Sunday morning there was concern following a report of ‘unusual activity’ in the South Pembrokeshire area. It had previously been heard on December 10.

Warren has been made aware that there have been recordings processed of actual verbal conversations between grown-ups before noon at premises known to be occupied by Tenby Rabbits members. There had been initial consternation when this was first discovered, but then it was eventually established that this rare phenomenon was due to the fact that the Winter League outing planned to take place had been cancelled by captain Paul due to the heavy rain forecast. This resulted in oral communication being heard early which doesn’t normally take place until the Rabbits return home later in the day.

It is hoped that the ‘unusual activity’ won’t be repeated next Sunday.