Handy Andy wins

by a neck.

June’s Kilgetty Golf Society’s fixture was held last Wednesday at the little gem of a course near Coychurch in the Vale of Glamorgan. Coed Y Mwstwr Golf Club is a favourite venue for many of us, although some who didn’t play well there thought otherwise. But before the race to the 19th began, we had a withdrawal as Colin ASBO Davies’s car broke down on the way and he was stranded at Sarn Services. Hard luck Colin - hope it’s fixed before the next venue at Pontardawe.

Car problems had also beset Don The Reverend Abbott who failed to hear the starter and needed to be given a lift by Nigel Scissors Taylor. Then, after a delay caused by Steve Gizmo Jones failing to organise the runners and riders in good time, things seemed to be going well on the course, until Phil Rolling Stone Smith pulled up hard on the 12th as he felt he was already running well behind the pack and remembered he had better things to do than play golf! So out of 22 entries, only 20 finished the course.

So who burnt up the track and who were also rans? Well we can discount those who were on long odds, namely, The Reverend, making a comeback after a decade in South Africa; new members Joe Lofty Braithwaite and Perry Bonzo Phillips, who were startled by the crowd at the starting line; and the wounded but plucky buggy riders John Javelin James, Roger Doombar Woodward, and John Pashmina Perrott, who fortunately remained seated on their steeds.

A lot of money, however, was riding on Wayne Gypsy Connett, John Dynamo Richards, Adrian 999 Alman, and Wynne Andy Capp Richards, but they found the going too heavy for them. Scissors unfortunately also failed to cut the mustard.

In better fettle and exceeding 30 points were, in ascending order, Steve Gizmo Jones, Wyn Nomad Hopkins, Mike Slippery Skidmore, Bob Dixie Forrest, Barry Nippy Neale, and Roger Analyst Handcock. Which left three going neck to neck for the lead, but it was not quite a photograph finish. In third position came Keith Director Leverton with 35 pts, second by a head with 37 pts was Peter Peroni Hughes, with the jet-lagged, Indonesian colt, Andy Popeye Bevans exceeding all expectations by breasting the tape with 38 pts. Well done Popeye.

After a well-earned visit to the water trough (bar) and a filling chicken curry and apple crumble and ice-cream (no wonder none of our entries for the Derby have been successful), Gizmo announced the other prizes as follows:

Nearest the pin - Dixie; longest drive - Bonzo; 20-plus handicap - The Analyst; nearest pin second shot - The Analyst; two - Peroni; team - The Director, Como and Popeye; wooden spoon - The Reverend.

Thanks to all for coming. I hope the sunburn heals well. We hope to see you next time at Pontardawe, Wednesday, July 13. New members welcome, please see our web site www.kilgettygolf.co.uk.