Sir,

Your article entitled, 'Let's Junk Unwanted Post For Good,' which appeared in a recent issue of the Tenby Observer, inspired me to retrieve from my archives a letter which I previously wrote, but never sent. It is, however, an actual happening.

My home was recently visited by a smartly dressed, well spoken young gentleman who identified himself and he stated that he was carrying out a survey on behalf of Pembrokeshire County Council. This survey was appertaining to 'Compostables Recyclables and Paper.' In short C.R.A.P.

As a true patriot, this subject really touched my heart. I would go to great lengths in order to preserve and enhance the quality of life in this wonderful country, Wales.

Our uninvited guest questioned me at great length, whilst he appended ticks to a pro-forma. Not being an anarchist, I remained fully co-operative, answering all questions put to me. All 20 of them and all whilst shivering on the door step!

'My friend' then requested to examine the 'council issued compost bin' and contents. Yet again I obliged and indeed I proceeded to 'lead him up the garden path,' where a detailed examination of the said bin and contents was carried out and noted. Further 'ticks' were added to the form. I was overcome. I was now in receipt of more ticks in one examination than I ever received throughout my six years in 'High School, Preseli on the Hill.'

Suddenly, the mood changed. Questions became more personal, thus causing acute aggravation to my diverticulum, oedema of glotti and hypertension, as I had probably been composting to this degree when 'my friend's' posterior was the size of Van-Heussen shirt button. I'd had enough, though patiently escorted 'my friend' back down the garden path, from whence he had come. Though at an accelerated rate of knots!

Bidding 'my friend' a good day, I was live to the situation, that all the information gleaned during the 'interrogation' would be fed into a computer and further sold onto market research. Thus, generating more C.R.A.P. to be posted through one's letter box at a later date, yet again! This in exchange will be fed into one's shredder and finally into the 'council issued compost bin,' which 'my friend' can examine during his next visit!

As in law, there is always an exception to the rule. Certain C.R.A.P. such as 'credit card invitations' will as per norm be torn into little pieces, placed in the 'pre-paid envelopes' and in the words of the 'Great King of Rock' (Elvis), 'Return to Sender!'

Please note, the term 'my friend' should be interpreted as...and Brutus is an honourable man, 'Speech in' The Forum' (Julius Caesar). I believe that it is known as 'dramatic irony.'

G. Ll. Phillips,

Pembroke.