I think this week's report should include an image of Derek 'Bubbles' Bath (seen right), who was digitally captured early on the morning of November 4 while on his way to the first tee.

It is exactly this kind of sartorial elegance, coupled with attendance to dress detail in preparation for a round of competitive golf that makes the Chicken Trotters the envy of the entire club!

The often used phrase, 'They come from miles around!', is certainly true of the Trotters. Just like last week, Brian Morgan motored in from Gorseinon to strut his stuff, joined by the ever-upbeat Peter Ellis from Clydach - I think they just want to test my spelling!

The chickens enjoyed another lovely Friday morning, with much peeling off waterproofs and sweaters around the course. Lots of very enjoyable golf was played, and when Mickey and Steve completed their calculations, they announced the following results:

Winner - Brian Morgan, Leaping out of bed at 6 am, 'Morgy' threaded his way down the deserted roads to an early start on the links, where he burned up the course to amass an outstanding 35 points. Impressed by this high score, Mickey awarded him a less than exciting sum of £1.30. To ensure that he won't repeat this achievement, Brian was cruelly slashed five shots to a temporary 13 handicap

Second - Derek Bath. Not just a male model, the well-trousered Bubbles fought his way to an admirable 33 points, encouraged by his playing partner Ken Gouldsbrough. As Mickey presented him with his winnings, I detected just the merest glimmer of disappointment from Bubbles as he pocketed one solitary quid! Worse was to come as he was penalised three strokes for three weeks - was that a tear we saw trickling down those bronzed cheeks?

The booby - Carey D'arcy. There was a great deal of anxious anticipation before Mickey announced the name of the tail gunner this week - obviously many trotters were in the frame. However, Carey beat them to the 30p with an underwhelming 16 points. On the bright side - and I have only discovered this lately - he was awarded an increase of two shots to his trotter handicap. It seems that previous booby winners have been given the same bonus - a rare gesture of kindness and understanding from the normally draconian Chief Chicken!

Amazingly for such benign conditions, no twos were recorded - so the kitty benefits.

The par was 28, arrived at by dividing the grand total of all the strokes played by all the players (as far as possible) by the total number of players - 16. It is interesting to note how easily one can score 12 points under this figure to collect the booby, but how very difficult it is to equal Morgy's winning score of seven points over. Must try harder!

Let us hope for more good weather and a large turnout today (Friday).

See you there!

M.F.