The start of the 2012/13 season for Manorbier has been a bit like playing Countdown with Carol Vorderman. Having chosen one from the bottom, one from the middle, and one from the top, the descendants of Giraldus Cambrensis were left trying to create an equation which would total nine points, but were only able to muster four points and four goals in the 270 minutes allotted.

In the first game of the season against Narberth, Manorbier displayed the kind of lucid fluidity of which the verbal love child of Stephen Fry and Oscar Wilde would be proud, only to find themselves losing the game having tripped back into the gutter whilst staring at the Narberth stars from the first division.

Against Lawrenny, a mouthful of consonants were jumbled together and spat out like a Les Dawson piano concerto, but the game was ultimately salvaged for a draw when Manorbier finally remembered how to spell.

And in last Saturday's game against Haverfordwest Cricket Club (once again failing to realise that the cricket season ended the week before), the merry band of Norman villagers somehow managed to align the abacus so that 4+2+1+2+1 = 3 points, even though they spent much of the game trying to fit square pegs into round holes.

The numbers from the Haverfordwest game were staggering. Number of dragbacks by Luke Askew: just 5. Number of back-headers from Blackwell to Llewellyn: 9. Years before Paul Maytum gets a free bus pass: 15. Year in which Owen Monaghan was born: 1996. Number of golden chances falling to James Hall: 3. Number of runs made by Ben Hall: 45. Number of times Mike O'Neill lost the ball: 0. Number of tackles missed by Tom Grover: 0. Goals scored by Spic: 1. Flicks executed by Jake Webster: 12. Percentage of Time Haverfordwest looked threatening: 0.1 per cent. Subs on bench unused: 3. Final Score: 1-0 to the 'bier.

Division three looks like being a mixed bag this season, with all teams capable of taking points off one another - reflected in the results already seen this year.

Manorbier can have genuine ambitions for promotion, or at least a Europa League spot, if they can get their figures to stack up and find a few seven letter words from the hand that Carol deals.

Even more important numbers relate to the sponsorship that has been kindly provided by local businesses to support Manorbier FC. The Swan pub, Beach Break, The Castle pub, Kelpie campsite, The Manorbier Post Office and shop, The Playroom, Solartint and Mister-Tees have all contributed to put Manorbier FC on a sound financial footing for the season.

We are incredibly grateful for all their contributions.