Again I must start this Divots Winter League report with more apologies following some remarks made in last week's article. Firstly, I suggested that the Rabbits play their golf from the ladies' tees and apparently this has offended some at the club. It was never the intention to offend anyone and for that I humbly apologise, to the ladies! Secondly, it was remarked that the Rabbits don't hit the fairways very often with their drives, not even the wrong fairways. This apparently is totally untrue and, in fact, the Rabbits are hitting the wrong fairways with great regularity, so I once again apologise for the inaccuracy in my previous report. This week's games got off to a slow start due to a couple of 'no shows'; they must have thought better of it after waking up to the rain and rolled back over. Obviously not everyone reads these reports or they would have known that it does not rain in Tenby on a Sunday morning and, once again, not only did the rain stop, but we also had spells of sunshine. Not knowing at the time of the missing players, Rob Hall and Richard Chapman were catapulted to the front of the playing order as they were already a two-ball. They started with two amazing drives. Rob's was amazing because he managed to hit the first fairway, whereas Richard's, with such strong winds, travelled an amazing 330 yards, a distance you would only expect by the likes of Tiger Woods and John Daley. Pity it was 330 yards straight up into the air then. Rob was obviously not too impressed with his partner on the first hole, as he was heard remarking that it took him four shots just to reach his own drive. Just as well Rob was there to score the five and start their score with a solid two points on the first. In fact, it was just as well Rob was there for the whole of the front nine, with Richard only managing to score on two of the holes, and both of those with just a single point. Twenty points turned out to be a good score on the front nine, considering the start. It was a tale of two halves, though, with Richard doing all the damage on the back nine and Rob having to taking a back seat, just coming in on the 10th and 18th holes. But thanks to his handicap, he was able to contribute six points on those. Looking for a good score, Rob and Richard got greedy on the 15th by trying to take the dog-leg out of play and both went straight towards the green. Unfortunately, you are only allowed five minutes to look for your ball, and with both of theirs last seen bouncing through Penally railway station at a good speed, it was decided to abandon the hole, suffering their only blob of the day. A steady four, three, four finish gave the pairing 18 points on the back nine and a total of 38. A round of golf played in record time left Rob and Richard waiting in the clubhouse for the others to return and for the bar to open. Next out were Loz Phillips and John Stevenson playing as a two-ball. Don Sigsworth did turn up, but with no partner, decided he would be better off sitting by the coal fire at home than out on the course having to play with a blind partner. There was great expectation on the first tee, with Loz having arrived complete with new driver in hand. Having played in the same group with Loz the previous week, and seeing how well he had been hitting the rest of the matching set of woods and irons, there could only be one outcome with this new weapon in hand, and that of course was straight down the middle. Loz, being such a sensible chap, has bought the new Ping driver with the conforming club head; the downside to the legal club head is a slight loss in distance. Unfortunately, Loz was not expecting such a reduction of distance and found himself with over 430 yards still to go to reach the green. Not to worry, partner John came to the rescue, securing a point on the first and encouraging his partner to pull his finger out with 17 holes still to go -hope Loz kept the receipt! Loz did bounce back, scoring most of the points on the remaining front nine, with John standing in the wings ready to jump in if required. Required he was and with a par on the ninth hole secured a three- pointer and a reasonable 17 points for the front nine. Lots to do on the back nine for the pairing and with them dovetailing well, a back nine of 20 and an overall 37 points was satisfactory in the conditions. Let's hope Loz can adjust his game to suit the new sticks and produce the 40-pointer he has been promising since the AGM in early October. Next away were Terry Picton and Clive Law playing with Gareth Phillips and Gavin Field-Thomas. Terry didn't look too keen to go out and play golf when he arrived at the club; not sure whether it was the rain and wind, or the fact he was playing in the same group as The Walrus following Gavin's antics the previous week. I'm sure it must have been the weather, as within half-an-hour of teeing off he was smiling; either that or laughing at the big man's jokes. Sorry, they can't be repeated in this family newspaper. It was Gavin who was the one laughing this week, having witnessed the first drive from Loz. Obviously the two were going to miss playing together this week, so Gavin was delighted not to have missed watching Loz almost have a fresh air shot - a shot patented by Gavin. After picking himself up following Loz's drive, Gavin gathered his composure and proceeded to hit a reasonable first shot, outdriving Loz by at least 200 yards and managing to keep the ball within the boundaries of the course, which is always a bonus for Gav. Having been driven to the club by Gavin (cheers Gav), I know how much he was looking forward to playing with Gareth Phillips this week, with him being the hot favourite and such a bandit (Gavin's words), Not sure that the feeling was a mutual one, but as usual, Gareth, taking things very seriously, could be seen out on the practice ground warming up. It's only Gareth's second year in the Divots and he hasn't yet grasped the true meaning of warming up. To all the other Divots, a good warm-up means two cups of coffee or tea before stepping out onto the first tee. In fairness, though, Gareth is usually one of the only guys to hit a half-decent drive on the first, so perhaps the rest should look and learn. Gareth also had the pressure of having to match the performance of Gavin's partner from last week, Gareth Rees. But obviously not the putting - although it should be recorded that sometimes these things get exaggerated in the press. With the pressure not showing for a while, the pairing started with five points on the first two holes, until a blob on the third. Indeed, they had a satisfactory start to the round, with 18 points on the front nine and Gareth doing much of the damage. Commendably, Gavin did very little damage, to anybody or anything, and even managed to keep the ball in front of him throughout the round. Terry and Clive got off to a disappointing start with only one point after the first two holes, but bounced back with a couple of net pars. A solid last two holes on the front nine bagged them six points and helped to recover their round with 15 points at the halfway stage. Both pairings were left with a bit to do on the back nine, and it was Terry and Clive who produced the better score of 18 points. Gareth was obviously finding the strain a bit too much with a blob and two single-pointers which equalled a disappointing back nine of 15 and saw both pairings level with 33 points overall. Apparently, Gareth Phillips is not all he's cracked up to be and will have to perform better if he wants to take the title, that is according to a source who wishes to remain anonymous. Cheers for the lift home by the way. Last out this week were the big guns of Adam Joseph and Nigel Ayers, playing with Gareth Rees, who was also victim of a 'no show' and so was drawn with a blind partner. Previously, the guys who have had to play with a blind partner have commented on the difficulty of playing not knowing what the partner was doing. For Gareth, this should not have been a problem as he had drawn Adam and would be in the same group, although pressure for Adam with two partners. Along for the ride was Fred Adlam, an ex-Divot who now prefers to play his golf with the Rabbits. Who can blame him, they are a much nicer bunch of blokes. Fred would be in for a delightful display of golf playing in this group. Talking of displays of golf, Nigel has made it clear to this correspondent that he was not very happy that it was his playing partners who were credited for the good scores posted so far, with all of them 40 points plus. This week he would let his clubs do the talking and proceeded to blast his first drive straight into the middle, the middle of the ladies' tee, I'm afraid, and failed to score on the first hole, and had to rely on his partner for the points. Adam and Gareth duly came up trumps and both posted two points each. Nigel, not one to be kept down for long, blasted his second drive some 300 yards. Unfortunately, it landed on the 14th fairway, leaving himself with much the same distance to the green. Adam and Nigel struggled to score and had to settle for the single point, with Gareth slotting an easy 18-inch putt for par and two points. Next hole Adam nearly reached the green with his drive, the hole measuring some 380 yards, and both Nigel and Gareth were happy to leave their partner do the work and secure an easy three points. Another three points from Adam on the fourth hole was good news for both teams and it was away to the fifth tee. Any time you want to join in, Nigel, was the remark from his partner, and join in he did, with a wonderful drive down the middle, a simple wedge and then slotted the birdie putt. A shot hole for Nigel and four points, leap-frogging Gareth, whose par was only enough for two points. Straightforward pars for both teams on the sixth and onto the par four seventh hole, playing particularly long into the wind. Gareth hit a reasonable drive, but was still left with a full two- iron to the green and was satisfied with the 20-foot putt he had left himself; the par guaranteed. The hole was reduced to a drive and an eight-iron for both Adam and Nigel, with exceptionally long drives into the wind. Unfortunately, Adam put his second into the bunker and had to settle for a five and two points. Nigel only just missed the green with his second shot and wasn't too far from the green with his third shot either! Two fives, a disappointing result from such good drives. Oops, it was a six for Gareth, forgot about the first drive that landed in the beer garden of The Crown pub, Penally (who says this report is not true and accurate). Level pars from both teams on the remaining front nine holes, meant it was 21 points for Adam and Nigel, with 20 points a very satisfying score for Gareth. A brilliant back nine would follow from Adam, picking up extra points on the 10th, 12th with a birdie and a fantastic eagle three on the par five 14th, resulting in both teams recording four points. Solid finishes saw both Nigel and Gareth securing pars on the tough 16th, although there was a little slip from Adam and Nigel on the 17th, with Adam only being able to score a single point compared to Gareth's par and two points. You can't hold a good man down, though, and Adam bounced back with another birdie on the last and three more points for both teams. A total of 45 points for Adam and Nigel, which now leads the overall for the prize of best score, and a satisfying 42 points for Gareth, who not only gained from playing with his blind partner, but also had a lucky draw, picking the player of the day. Although someone with a suspicious mind might query why Adam was out of a couple of holes on the back nine when Nigel had the security of an extra shot, not Gareth, he knows there's nobody more honest than this pair. And as far as Nigel not getting any of the credit for the great score, I counted him in on at least three holes - you make up your own mind. To conclude the day, the draw for this Sunday took place and is as follows: 1. R. Morton and J. Stevenson with Andrew Morton and Alan Morton; 2. J Thomas and R. Hall (capt) with A. Joseph and T. Picton; 3. G Phillips and C. Law with N. Ayers and L. Phillips; 4. R Wilcox and G. H. Rees with Steve Davies and G. Field-Thomas. A sheet has now been put up in the clubhouse with a few mobile 'phone contact numbers. We would ask all those taking part in the league take note of the numbers, and if you are then unable to make it on the morning, please contact one of the numbers so that the rest of the players are not delayed.
The Rabbits League... and the mystery of the disunited ear
The weather in the first week of November must have been one of the wettest on record. Driven by gale force winds the damp clung and it would have been no surprise if Noah had re-appeared with his ark. Life had been truly wretched. But by Sunday there were breaks in the cloud. The wind was just a puff and apart from one sharp shower the Rabbits enjoyed good conditions for the third week of the Winter League, and it was good to get some fresh air. The Tenby Links dries out quickly. We are very fortunate. There wasn't much sign of life in the normally ebullient David Morgan this week. He had totally forgotten the words of his sports dietician guru. On the previous day he had been spotted on TV in a hospitality suite at the Millennium Stadium dining on a barrel of oysters, all washed down with Guinness and Champagne. Clearly the oysters were not fresh and he and partner Anthony Allen were dispatched rather comfortably by the big-hitting combination of Mike Hale and a rather lopsided Chris Smith. This Chris Smith thing is very interesting. Readers will be fascinated. Early in the week, while entering his car, an enormous gust took hold of the door; smashing it shut. Unfortunately, it severed his ear. Fountains of blood. Dreadful pain. By Sunday he was keen to play in true Corinthian spirit, and turned up with a temporary new ear fashioned out of cardboard. It was a blessing for him that the early victory allowed him to miss the one shower of rain that fell. The Rabbits to a man were all sympathetic and told him not to do that again. After only three matches it is too early to draw any conclusions from the league table. Stephen Watkins and Glyn Price, together with Ben Blake and Jason Rolfe are the only unbeaten pairs and all sit crowing on their perch. However, readers who have followed the Rabbit fortunes over the years will know that all four are habitual losers and no prudent investor would put money on any of them. But let them strut. Let them be smug. But don't believe a word they say about form and ability. There is none. Theirs is just transient happiness. If your correspondent could be a pundit for a couple of minutes, he would suggest a small investment on Dafydd Evans and R. F. Murphy. They are playing well at present and on Sunday destroyed the very strong pairing of David Lemon (standing in as substitute for Jerry Whitehouse) and Macky Harts. Apparently the ultra long hitting D. Evans would strike distant balls to the green whereupon R. F. Murphy sank the putt. A simple golf formula, but one which does not really give value for their club membership subscriptions. Regular readers will know that a nine or 10 keeps you sharp. Ron and Dafydd have the formula wrong. And that other Murphy (J. S.) together with Simon Evans must be watched. They have four points beneath their belts. On Sunday they even beat the Rabbits captain, Stephen Harries and his partner Derick Farley, in what must have been the shock result of the day. And after their victory, while huddled in a corner, I overheard them suggesting themes for their victory speeches scheduled for the Annual Dinner in March. Apparently J. S. Murphy will speak first. This is sickening. Bill Beynon and Dorian Thomas enjoyed a good victory over Dave Moran and Steve Hockings and will be in contention, I know. A word though on Steve Hockings. He was acquired by the Rabbits in the summer transfer window from a parkland club where he had enjoyed much success. The fact that his is currently languishing in joint bottom position in the table means nothing. At this time he is still playing the parkland course game. Hitting long and allowing the lush grass to hold his ball. Everyone knows that the links game is to bounce and bobble. A little spin here. A draw over the bunker too. When he has adjusted his game he will be formidable. But don't put your money on it. As I write this report my neighbours are trying to terrify me. The weather on November 5 had been too bad for the traditional fireworks display and they are at it as I write. All around me bang, crash. George Pegg and John Hunt won. Rees Davies and Mike Munro lost. Ben Blake and Jason Rolfe won of course, and I have little to report on that victory over Eugene Boyd and Mark Edwards. You see, I tried to interview E. Boyd when he was taking his shower. I had always thought he was a kind, God- fearing gentleman. Now I know. He does not like the press. The Rabbits captain in his speech reported that a new supply of Rabbit regalia was in transit. Goodness, I hope he knows what he is doing, this man. Is he going to have us wearing crowns and coronets? Match results were: W. Beynon and D. Thomas beat D. Moran and S. Hockings 4 and 3; G. Pegg and J. Hunt beat R. Davies and M. K. Munro 4 and 3; S. Evans and J. S. Murphy beat D. Farley and S. Harries 2 and 1; B. Blake and J. Rolfe beat E. Boyd and M. Edwards 2 and 1; M. Hale and C. Smith beat D. Morgan and A. Allen 8 and 7; S. Watkins and G. Price beat N. Dickinson and P. Davies 4 and 3; D. Evans and R. F. Murphy beat D. Lemon and M. Harts 6 and 5; Fred Adlam and Paul James had a bye this week.