What can you think of that is worse than two women going shopping together? I can tell you in one easy sentence - four women going shopping together. And it is all the more painful when it is your wife who is one of the four. Think about it lads, not just one evil mind to convince the better half to spend money on something that you don't really need, but three of them; the legs go all wobbly just thinking about it.

That was the scenario last week when Mags, Vi, Alma and Lorna all headed off to Llanelli. The idea was, I was informed, to pick up stuff for the ladies' entertainment crowd who are going on tour this year.

I have no doubt they did get the odd dress or three. In fact, I have it on good authority that Vi managed to get Lorna into a dress that defied gravity (I just can't wait). But, of course, as luck would have it (says who), they managed to by mistake walk into a couple of furniture shops. So it will be no surprise to the other menfolk when they learn that new furniture will probably be arriving soon,

What's that lads, you did not know anything about it? Oops, sorry girls.

MEMORIES ARE

MADE OF THIS

They do say that the memory is one of the first things that goes when you reach that certain age (what was I doing?). Nay, thrice nay, my memory is still in fine fettle.

I cannot say the same thing about Tony Shaw, I fear.

The story goes like this. He went up to Heatherton the other week to play a game. On arrival, he was slightly behind schedule, so rushed to get his woods out and get ready. Pulling on one shoe, he rummaged about in the bag for the other. Horror of horrors, he had only packed the one shoe.

Suggestions from his opponents that he should cut one leg off were not at all funny (well not to Tony). Now, being a straight-thinking Scot, I would have played in my stocking feet, but not our Tone, he shot off to the bowls shop and coolly bought another pair.

Now, speaking to wife Elaine later, I suggested that perhaps it was just a ploy to get a new pair of shoes. She seemed surprised that I suggested it (I think I have been around women too long) - just read the above paragraph Elaine.

COACHING COURSE MEETING

A reminder combined with a plea to you Saundersfoot members: there will be a meeting this Tuesday evening in the pavilion with the area coaching organiser to discuss the dates for the course.

I am on my knees here folks. Please, please, as many as possible come along; we want as many entrants as possible.

And please bring with you a highlighter pen (the mind boggles)!

Fortunately, since last week, I have had a another volunteer for the course, but please, the more the merrier. Let's have a great turnout, with plenty of qualified coaches at the end of the course.

PLACE THE FACE No.7

The entry for number seven, which by the way was Ann Lewis, was tremendous. Thanks for taking part.

A total of 19 got it right, so out came the hat, and the better half drew out the name of Graham Poole, our beloved chairman. Hard lines the rest, but don't give up, it could be you next.

I do worry about the ones who thought that it was either Vi Austin or Mary Cavell!

PLACE THE FACE No.8

I really thought that last week's was dead easy, but when the first 'phone call I got thought it was none other than Terry Thomas, I realised that I could be wrong.

Another thought it was John Austin (he gets in everywhere), but when the person concerned actually 'phoned up and asked if he could enter, I waved the white flag.

It was, in fact, Gareth Phillips. He did not know his Auntie had sent me the photo, you see, hence him wanting to take part (cheeky monkey). The winner will be announced next week.

PLACE THE FACE No.9

I have decided to get like him off Pop Idol and get nasty. This week's is a real humdinger.

Going back a few years (she will agree, I am sure), this little beauty was a real heart-breaker in her early years - her old man still thinks she is even now (coward).

I suppose I had better give you the odd clue. She is a natural leader, has a wicked sense of humour and a fair voice. Got it yet? If you look closely, I still think there is a strong resemblance to how she looks now. We shall see.

MEMBERSHIP FEES

Oh no! I hear you groan, he is off again. Well I am indeed. Eventually, some of you will give in and pay George a visit to pay your fees nice and early. It will be a busy day on opening day, so do yourself a favour and pay up early this year.

SPONSORSHIP

Like every organisation, we are always on the look-out for companies to sponsor the club throughout the season, whether it be the Open Weeks or even the fixture cards.

Let's be honest, most of you will turn up on opening day and hand over your money to George's welcoming hand. In return you will expect to be given not only a receipt, but a smart, pretty fixture card, and guess what, they cost money to print. We have always been very lucky in the past in that through members' efforts, they have managed to get the cards sponsored, so that the club saves some money. This year, so far, the old faithfuls have once again stuck by us and stepped into the breach by sponsoring the cards yet again.

The thanks of the club go out to Shirley and John Murphy, of Kilgetty Post Office; Jane and Bart Gilbert, of Kilgetty Pharmacy; and Richard, of Big Brums, for backing the club yet again. The Old Pump Filling Station, Pentlepoir, has also agreed to sponsor the fixture cards this season.

Texaco have already come forward with sponsorship for the Men's Open Week, and of course we have the ongoing backing of Pembrokeshire Financial Services, who are the main sponsors of the club for the next few years.

You might think that is plenty, but I can assure you, it takes more to run a club like ours. Without sponsorship we just could not survive, especially running the ladies' and the gents' open tournaments.

So, if you know anyone who might be willing to donate a couple of quid, why not pop in and ask them. They can only say one of two things, and one of them might be rude.

CLUB TOUR

President John has asked me to mention the fact that the tour is now only a matter of seven weeks away. All is organised, hotel rooms, games, transport and even a plea to the man up above for good weather.

John's only worry is that some of you have not been saving your pennies for pocket money. Please make sure that you call on your friends for the odd copper or two as spending money.

WHIST EVENING

It was another enjoyable evening in good company with the whisters, and a busy evening with eight-and-a-half tables on the go.

King of the castle with top score was B. Marsh, while first lady was M. Robb, with G. Cleaton runner-up. Taking the honours as first gent was R. Jones. The first half top scorer was J. Davies, while the booby for lowest score went to David Nicholas, and the laziest person in the room as longest sitter was Jim Rose.

The evening's raffle prizes were claimed by G. Brace and W. Thomas.

100 CLUB

The draw for March was as follows: 1. £50 - E. Pendlebury (number 35); 2. £25 - J. Hassan (number 87); 3. £10 - J. Bingham (number 23).

NARROW BIAS