Once again this year, John and Gloria Dugmore organised an excellent week's Bowling Tour, the venue this time being sunny Bournemouth.

Unfortunately, the sunny bit of the heading went walk about, but it could do nothing to diffuse the enjoyment of everyone who travelled with them. Mind you, we should have realised that things would go wrong from the start. There we were travelling merrily along on the Warminster bypass, when suddenly there were all these blue flashing lights, and police cars overtaking us.

Phyllis, our driver, panicked, thinking that she had been speeding. A bit further down the road, however, we found our way blocked by a pleasant policeman, who informed us that we could go no further on that road as there had been a major incident.

When John asked the best way to Bournemouth, he was politely informed that 'he was not a map reader'. Our intrepid navigators, Dai King and John, smiled to themselves! Methinks they knew something we didn't.

As it happens, we extended our journey by another half hour or so, but that, as anyone who has been on these tours will tell you, is nothing unusual. In fact, I hear tell that already the bookings are pouring in for the next one. People are not worried about the bowling side of things, it is just that they know they will see more of the countryside surrounding the destination, thanks to the various 'unscheduled trips', before finding the actual spot. It was worrying when for the first two days of games, we actually drove direct to the grounds without any hiccups! People were looking disappointed.

The hotel was superb this year, lovely large rooms, and excellent food, with very helpful staff to boot. As is the norm, the first night was spent exploring the surroundings and especially finding the way to the bar; a quiet night preparing ourselves for the battles to come.

Sunday dawned a beautiful day with glorious sunshine (if only we had known what was to come). Gloria had phoned trying to book meals, only to be told, no trouble, just turn up, we can cope with any amount!

We arrived at about 12.45 and promptly ordered our meals, various salads, sarnies and chicken in the basket. At about 1.45, a few decided that, as they were playing in 10 minutes and it's not courtesy to take the plates onto the green with them, they had better cancel their meal and have their money back - just as well really, as we found the chicken in the basket was in fact frozen chicken nuggets (still frozen).

But the game got underway and it turned out to be a cracking day's bowling amongst nice people. Monday saw a dull start, with the wets being called into use during the game.

Tuesday was slightly worse, as the wets were on from the start. Even Noah would have called it a day, with horrendous rain, and a closed road causing yet another trip around the houses, ending up with us being guided to the ground by a lad on a bike! After nine ends and some threats to his manhood, captain for the day, Mike Gouldingay, called a halt to proceedings.

Wednesday was slightly better, but again a shortened game took place. Thursday saw us having a welcome rest day, with a chance to relax, while the womenfolk managed yet another trip around the shops.

Friday saw us have the morning in Poole, with surprise, surprise, more shopping! We then travelled back for our last game, and would you believe it, we got lost again, although to be fair, the green was just behind the houses, hiding from us. And another day of wearing the wets beckoned. The results for the week, were as follows: Sunday v Knyveton 120 to 106; Monday v Richmond Park 141 to 112; Tuesday v Kings Park 47 to 33 (nine ends); Wednesday v Meyrick Park 81 to 104 (18 ends); Friday v Argyle BC 87 to 111 (18 ends).

Each night, John would award the usual best and worst rinks and at the same time fine anyone who had upset him on the day, the money being given to the staff on the Saturday morning. On Friday night, a couple of girls had collected from all the members and decided to present John with a gift - they had found a ventriloquist's dummy that was more like John than John was! The tears of laughter from everyone summed up what was once again a super trip, and already everyone is asking for next year's destination.